AIM automatically accepts video chats on my laptop. I found this out when I got a text from Jacob after my first attempt at drunk lesbian sex saying, "I'd give it a 7. You need to work on your positioning." I think I'm single now.
we didnt fuck last night. again. seriously, his place is like where dreams go to die.
once he started yelling at me in latin, i wasn't sure what we were fighting about anymore...
yes we were fucking thats why i put "watching a movie" in quotations
my coke dealer is running a Black Friday special
As I was leaving the drunk tank the cop told me he had a feeling we would be meeting again real soon.
His bookmark is a piece of toilet paper. No shame there.
The walk home from the bar is FAR more shameful in daylight.
I just learned my tits were fire resistant. I should join the freakin circus
So he drunk messaged me last night telling me he wants a baby. Think I should call his bluff?
Thanks for setting a pic of your balls as my desktop background. You'll find you're cc'ed on the mass email of it.
The last thing I remember is singing hotel California with a hobo and asking every bald man I saw if I could touch his head.
How many Wendy's frosties do you think it would take to fill a bathtub?
I mean, you've had my nipples in your mouth now, so I think we've reached a certain level of friendship.
He's really cute...He stopped talking to me because i pulled my skirt up and peed in a demi plie position...
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