i just saw a white kid with an afro using a martini shaker as a coffee thermos. go college.
just spent about 3 1/2 hours looking for a dollar so I can buy weed.
suggestion: become a stripper.
We went out. i got lost. dunno where they were. they slept in the car. i slept in an outdoor shower. i dont know anything else.
I kept telling myself all night that it was completely okay for me to lose all sense of my morals because it was my birthday.
Weird we were more concerned with sharing our germs than tag teaming the blow job?
i wasn't going to tell her about the threesome but i had to explain the tree and the green paint everywhere
He whinnies like a horse when he's cumming. I wish I would have known this before we got into a relationship.
So what do normal people wear to parties? Normal meaning not you.
You wear an inflatable farm animal to TWO THEMED PARTIES and I never get to hear the end of it...
And that's why we do second round interviews for possible roommates.
Hungover playing piano at a baptism I am the PICTURE of class I feel like I should be struck by lightning
Seriously, though. As long as it's attached to you and is not a vagina, I will not be disappointed.
I swear every time I see him he's either dancing or trying to touch people
Sometimes I think he has a hidden camera in my vagina so he knows what I'm doing and saying at all times...
it's like the easy bake oven version of plastic surgery
The school better be open next year. I’ve been FB stalking Dads of my incoming students and there’s serious DILFage in this class! Maybe 2020 will turn around!
It’s 2020. You’ll probably get knocked up. If you’re really lucky you’ll just get the clap
Randomize
