I miss you like a fat girl misses the prom.
Eric got herpes from Jo-ann
That's what he deserves for hooking up with a french canadian
never have i ever had a craving for dick this badly
he wouldn't shut up and let me sleep
yeah i got into a fight with my man last night
why can't men just shut up and put out?
I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
were talking about masturbation in my pysc class. He says it's healthy. I'm gonna live forever
he conducted the entire waffle house into singing the song Oklahoma. He was wasted.
I just remembered how awesome your handjobs were in 7th grade, you were a true champ, thank you
please stop yelling "ITS NARNIAAAAAAAAA" out of our window at the lone person walking home in the snow
We talked him into tasing himself.
I'm responsible for my client's overall well-being. Which is terrifying coming from someone that can't stop masturbating and eats leftover pizza just about everyday.
There's a baby duck in my toilet. Fuck you.
His dick was so bent it was like fucking captain hook's hand for 2 hours
You're an independent woman who is defined by her own actions and not by whether or not you have a man. You also have great tits.
Fuck I think I want to but I don't think I should. Caught between should and wanting.
just follow your vagina
Quote of the day.
Randomize