Have you ever slowed down next to the oldest people on the highway while getting road head just to see their extended reaction?
How do you know one of your one night stands hasn't produced a child? You may have hundreds of kids.
Pretty sure I don't. One night stands are purely anal..no exceptions.
his text ended with ... everyone knows dot dot dot equals infer sexy time
Jenny was looking for something soft to drink since it's only noon, she chose spiced rum. Think she might die today
I'm the fucking queen of sexting. I just made a blowjob sound so poetic I'm wishing I were a guy just so I could blow me. Learn from me.
I fucked a guy that's in Sports illustrated. I'm officially ready for college.
I offered to give him "road head" while he played GTA 5. I think he will be more optimistic about date night in the future.
I had no idea he had such passive aggressive animalistic tendencies. This is the human equivalent of peeing on someone.
I wouldn't marry anyone who wouldn't symbolically fuck a doughnut with a sausage though.
This is my last chance to be the first person to fall off this roof.
a homeless man let us know that my friend was asleep in the bushes outside my house on main street. So just a small get together.
I'm starting to think my emotional health is declining because I was watching transformers today and legit almost started crying
Sex while Star Warsing is the best
...this is why fuck buddies should be only for grownups.
I'll tell you all about it in person but let's just say the big dick fairy must really like me right now
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