I changed my mind about Tim Gunn. I like him now. Mostly because he said someone's dress looks like a gay t-rex. Or something.
you kept searching pizza on facebook and becoming a fan of each page dedicated to it
bio was interesting today. swabbed my mouth to see what the cells where, ha. found a sperm cell. he was just that awesome
I think the taxi driver just requested me on facebook..... his name was george right?
In the middle of having sex with me, she reminded me that I was supposed to call my mom that morning. My penis has never retracted so quickly.
thanks for the bloody nose. you probably dont remember, i'm not mad.. only because your boobs are to blame
You sat on my knee, like Santa, while I peed.
Did i mention i'm like the equivilent of a prepubescent boy suffering from preejaculacy? I just about creamed my pants when he grabbed my hand..
I know my whole body feels like I belly flopped onto concrete. Seriously need to tone it down for a while
He wins the giant teddy bear for getting the neuva ring on the dick
Idk how I even got accepted into college because literally the only things my brain ever thinks about are YouTube videos of baby animals and sex.
Plus you get to call him out on being a dick. It's more satisfying than ever sex I've ever had.
I wanna trust fall face first on a penis.
Girl behind me in line at CVS was getting impatient then outta nowhere blew up shouting that if she didn't get her plan B soon she might be a mom and that if we couldn't tell she'd be a horrible mom
How do you explain to your parents that you can't go to the library because you got banned for being drunk in there... on a Sunday afternoon?
That's $100,000 of quality education right there.
Randomize
