Id pretty much put it in anything at this point. Jello. Dogs. 12 year old boys
There need to be more gay people on my afternoon soaps.
I had to go to the bank to confirm purchases made on 10/31/09 because they were signed as Lady Gaga
The coffee from our coffee maker just hasn't tasted normal since we made Mac n cheese in it that one time....
There are paw prints all over my ceiling.
Had dinner with my ex husband. The box of wine is gone and I'm laying on the floor in my wedding dress. Where are you?!
Ahahhahaha I'm not that stupid but then again I thought cabo was in Africa until yesterday
He's nice but I'm a one bouncer kind of girl
Turns out the guy I peed on gave me a ride back to my dorm this morning.
You are a god.
these people use weed stems as birthday cake candles. I'm never coming home
This is me trying to take a picture to send to grandma. At 4. We were trying to look sober.
never planned on seeing last weekend's one night stand again, much less be on the same plane as him..
I'm 4,715,723% sure I don't give a fuck.
We were having sex and he started doing some weird swivel move. I was like wtf and he said sorry just trying to pop my knee.
I think I am just gonna marry that lesbian. She is more of a respectful gentleman than any of the guys I've slept with.
Randomize
