Well, she's an atheist who is addicted to the Sims.
Who isn't?
I am sleeping on the floor in your room so if you have sex in here just don't roll on me
he told me it was a naked video of him so i opened it. i just got rickrolled while sexting
Dont have access to internet. masturbating to shake weight commercial.
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
Dude. I knoww what ur thinking. Yes, your hand hurts. It's because you fell through a window. If and when you wake up, go to the hospital.
trapped on the roof of the strip club. help
I don't know but this 12 year old kid is soaking up all of our bad morals like a super tampon on the second day of my period
That's not fair! You can't come over after you just had sex and rub my dry spell in my face!
Had a burrito last night in your honor
That's the nicest thing you've ever done
Everyone says I win the strip club
So I should just walk in, look him in the eye and say, "I just came to fuck your brother, nice to meet you" and just walk to your room.
The perfect man would keep a whisky sour in my hand and give me endless sex. I really don't think that's too much to ask for.
Unless you count my weekly workout where I drink wine, listen to obscure/cheesy records, and pretend I'm a ballerina...no. I don't exercise.
After the "sex" was over I dressed as quickly as possible. And then he came over to me stark naked and embraced me. For over a minute. And all I could think was please get your penis off my dress.
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