I just found a frying pan...in my bed.
he pointed at my clit and asked with a confused face, 'whats this thingy??"
Her cooch smelled like a combination of bacon and sweat.
elementary school lunch room party. everyone brings their own lunch and can trade stuff. all juice is booze.
My history teacher just took his shirt off cuz the classroom was to hot. And then he invited us all to join him.
does she really think making her boyfriend delete me on facebook is going to magically stop us from hooking up?
we smoked out of your homemade aunt jamima bong
you called your neighbor "slutsauce" then passed out on the stairway. not even sure why, but props to you.
Today is leap day..... If that's not an excuse to blackout all day I don't know what is
He broke the bed, AND shit in the closet. What a way to lose his virginity. What a night.
Excuse me, but I got friendzoned and all I could think about was the fact that I didn't have my underwear back on yet.
Shit my boyfriend's roommate thinks thinks: I love getting woken up to the sound of my roommate getting a blowjob
Our house drank 90 beers yesterday afternoon before 8pm so add that to the list
Thought for a game. Duck, Duck, Grey Goose. If you're tapped, you take a shot. Then proceed as normal.
You know you're out of shape when you're sore after masturbating.
Randomize
