just took batteries out of my vibrator to play wii guitar hero. think i am gonna regret that move later tonight.
I don't know what's more sad having a rewards account at a liquor store or already racking up 273 dollar points since january
drunk me is my new role model. he's fearless. like not even afraid of tornadoes.
He did a line, told me my hair looked pretty against the background of the clouds, and then we fucked. Good afternoon
Just so you know there's a random man downstairs knocking on a door with a dozen roses and a 30 pack of beer. Unattractive or not, I'm inviting him in.
The chick who threw the party was all pissed cause she thought I made out with her boyfriend. Admittedly, I did, but she was throwing up and crying at the time so she really can't be that mad.
Ive been thinking this might sound random.. But we need a piano in our house next year specifically for railing chicks on it.
there is nothing ok with the fact that that was the 4th time i peed in the same parking ramp
I was like a damn cattle dog, I separated all the sheep, I can wing man for anyone on this campus.
when i got home she was standing in my front yard not wearing a shirt and halfway crying/ halfway laughing
Probably TMI here but I just rubbed one out while listening to thunderstruck, almost ripped my dick off.
Just saw the trailer for Spike Lee's version of Oldboy. They filmed a lot of it in A's building so like every scene features a place where I had or almost had sex. If oral counts then pretty much every scene.
we played animal sounds and i linked arms with her cuz we were both cats....fate and my community college drama teacher have chosen my one night stand
So his dick was definitely bigger than it looked in all the pictures he sent my daughter.
you could be the only one getting laid right now....yet your sitting in here making goat noises
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