i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
The guy I fucked last night is well worth up the ass tuition. I just wish I could tell dad thanks!
I'm pregaming before our pregaming dinner...with peanut butter and beer. I think I need to re-evaluate my budget...
Just the budget?
We've been broken up for 7 months. His mom sent me a card with a brochure inside titled "How at Risk for STD's are you?"
I'm making presurgery martini's. You need to be here.
you inspire me to be a worse person
Okay, quick math test. If our entire group can do at least 6 shots a night, how much alcohol will be needed to keep us shit faced for the rest of the week? This is for a grade. Anddd, go.
Stole a wheelchair from the hospital and rolled down the street smoking and drinking this is my weekend
In the midst of you puking your guts out, you stopped, looked at the globe in front of you and whispered "America.."
Fuck you come back. The old guy next to me is complementing me on my great choice of ring fingers,
Also, I called my liver hardcore in front of vet students last night and then wound up having three of them trying to palpate it. So...not saying that again.
I woke up this morning wearing his boxers as a shirt
who says I'm not relevant to the kids today? Just had snapchat sex, blows the roof off aim cyber sex
I think about him when I masturbate so I guess you could call it love
Thanks for the reference. If your boss hires me, I'll buy you a drink.
If my boss hires you, I'm going to need it.
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