just got double teamed by two guys I will be on beach patrol with this summer. six months until the season starts and I'm already 'that girl.'
Woke up next to my bed in a pile of skittles, sleeping on a pair of sweatpants. I can't believe the girl didn't stick around..
Been home for 3 days and already spiked coffee with Kahlua. Only 106 till we go back to school
I'm handcuffed to your bathroom sink. Save me.
An open call to all exes! i have a drunk text policy that requires i delete any and all texts after drink 3, however i have reason to believe i have done something stupid. if i have texted you that "I love you", "miss you" and/or conveyed any interest in getting back together with you in the last 24 hours i was belligerent and lying. That is all.
Where the royal fuck are you??
The depths of vodka hell.
started my period, we have to try again next week
if we have anymore sex before that my dick is gonna fall off. that is in no way a complaint
It was everywhere. My dick was a sprinkler of lost future children.
My snow day: told Cam, "we're not dating today, we're just roommates." No bra, boxers, drinking whiskey by myself for the past 2 hours, yelling at The Ultimate Fighter reruns from 3 years ago.
I just remember lots of butts and something about ranch dressing.
well, mom whipped her new boobs out at the dining room table. So yeah you could say we had a pretty casual thanksgiving
I don't drink nearly as much when I'm coupled, and that's not a lifestyle I can commit to
Sexy intern needs to have caveman sex with me
Maybe those shots of hot dog water wasn’t a good idea after killing a fifth of tequila.. but who’s askin
on one hand I spent like $120 last night..on the other that was the best sex of my life
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