Dude I'm so glad we're not friends anymore. It would have made fucking your stepmom last night really awkward. Dickwad.
I think my tv knows when im high and tells taco bell
There was a lot of him and a little penis
I like your house better though. Cause it has febreeze and lube.
I don't think you have any idea how kinky that sounds.
I woke up and blew hamburger out my nose. That kinda night.
Ate apple sauce off his penis. Nutritious and slutty.
it's gotten to the point where there are no existing good choices. even our good choices are bad choice by anyone's standards but ours.
i'm laying here naked in a pile of empty landshark bottles, is lauren still hiding under the toilet?
If magic marker is safe for kids, it should be safe for cats...right?
Can I just keep holy water in the night stand next to the vibrator?
Guess who's now on the no-fly list? If you guessed me, you'd be right.
if he becomes president of the united states, I will tell EVERYONE that i took his virginity.
Instead of going to my moms birthday party I went over and gave him head. I should win non girlfriend of the year award
Well, I like big penises but it's not like he walks around with it out or anything so yes I think he has beautiful eyes
Why do so many fanfic writers want to see hockey players get pregnant?
Randomize
