I would say the hottest chick there looked like Susan Boyle and the ugliest like Bea Arthur
Nice use of current day folklore
I can't lisssten to Lou Holtzsss ssspeak anymore
Lady GaGa only went backwards in convincing me she's not a man at the VMAs.
Someone just asked me to go to the dining hall for dinner and he will use one of his swipes to pay for my meal. i think this is a college version of a date
Suck a a big bag of reindeer cock bud. Sent from church. See you in hell
I wish my period boobs were my regular boobs.
No matter what you may say to me. You will still be the guy that managed to get his own cum in his hair.
It's like playing clue with my own life. I have to piece together what I did, where I was, how I did it, and who I did it to
found a hand written recpiet for 'one doe fawn' on an open crate in my living room need help to find it
where the hell would u of bought a deer
I just threw out a whole Christmas ham, 12 positive pregnancy tests, 3 empty vodka bottles and by ex boyfriends Latina porn collection in the same garbage bag. The homeless person who goes through the bins tonight knows I have nothing left to loose.
Clearly the ONLY reason why you were voted employee of the month is because of your upside-down beer funneling skills.
I just shit a hot coal. Pretty sure it's that fireball shot from yesterday.
Also, I pretty much need an IV of fluids straight to my soul
Almost lost a vagina lip in the great shave of '16
He woke me with blue berry pancakes and a blow job. He's a keeper.
Randomize
