Revelation of the day. Bulimia is dumb. Anorexia is easier.
You suck.
I wasn't interested in him...but then he played The Office theme song on acoustic guitar. I'm sorry.
These pubs in Ireland act like hand jobs aren't the universal currency
Its not monday til someone throws up in the hallway
at least the person I hooked up with donates to charity, the shirt I was wearing this morning was his relay for life shirt.
I bet. I bought a surfboard and a kite and filled my camelback with vodka-tonics. Let's do this
Denial and avoidance are my survival strategies for 2013.
Denial, avoidance and beer.
Hey, I took a sweater from your house. And, um, your little brother's virginity.
I just bought the spice girls album. We will be doing music videos in the near future. You are our baby spice-- don't fight it
we could do so many fantastic illegal things together. sexually and otherwise.
Bringing my cat to a booty call was not my finest hour
I wasn't even hungover I was just mourning my dignity
I just found (and ate) a chunk of a reese's that fell between my boobs. Problem is that I finished those off 3 days ago in a drunk induced sob session... Has it really been that long since I changed my clothes?!
He ate me out for an eternity. Like fell asleep, woke up, and he was still doing it.
why is there a thong in the fridge-NOT MINE-and a half of a pickle on the stairs?!
I don't wear thongs. The picle was for dipping. Ill explain later. Lacy or plain thong ?
Randomize