So she said grabbing my cock was like holding a giant crayola from pre-school.
that was the beginning of the end.
We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
You are an asshole
haha sleeping beauty awakes.
Where did you find this costume?
I hate when people I sell to add me on Facebook. I'm your dealer, not your friend, C'mon people.
On the one hand, she would be the biggest mistake of my year. On the other hand, she's here and drunk.
You know it's time to cut back when your unemployed drug dealer roommate tells you that you party too hard.
my professor saw me buying beer for the super bowl and said go patriots. thats how i know im getting an A in his class.
I feel like somebody ate me, then shit me into my bed.
You better keep a close eye on your uterus tonight cause I am looking good.
I've entered the world of uncircumcised penises. It's disgusting.
I stepped in puke last night then washed it off my shoe with beer. Is there a grace period to respect before wearing them to class?
Sooooooo this guy just asked me if I'd be interested in a threesome... I'm considering bc I would get to hang out with his dog afterwards.
You can come over but I have to warn you that it is naked Sunday.
We're so high we're eating flavored lube.
Left him blackout in the cab, gave 20$ to the cabbie and said drive until the meter said he wasn't getting a tip.
Bangkok has him now.
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