Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
god help us all. i just saw an infant wearing a onesie that said "i don't know who my daddy is"
you washed your face with toilet water last night.. i tried to stop you but you wouldn't have it.
Fuck the gym. I just shaved m'cooch and my pants now fit looser.... Dont judge me.
Pre-order weed for 4/20 and i'll give you a discount.
you handed the cop a condom last night and said "it's all about protect and serve right?"
she said my body looked tiny like it was a bad thing and then didn't even mention how great my tits look. it's like we're not even friends.
Dude i'm seriously thinking about his nipples.
I would never do this in real life. It's only college.
Sunrise bitch. You owe me waffles
Holy shit, I just successfully took and sent a boob pic AT MY DESK I have conquered an entire new level of skill.
im glad im back to a point in my life where i have enough sex to sometimes be offered and be like naw im good.
She said "we just have chemistry" ... I wanted to say "no, you just have a vagina."
If you had amazing eyebrows i'd have sex with them.
so apparently over the course of the night my roommate and i had sex in exactly the same spot. ps the downstairs sink needs cleaning.
Randomize
