Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
I'm pouring my heart out in these texts and you're going around showing everyone???
Did I tell you he has dinosaur sheets?
1. Call me if you need ANYTHING. 2. If you get tag teamed, I want details.
She used to be a real nice person. Now she's just a dick sucking machine
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO LOOK FUCKABLE IN AN ALL NEON SPANDEX JUMPSUIT?
Captain Morgan didnt let me down when i stand up it feels like the world is trying to hand me rainbows.
If if makes you feel any better, you're definitely the hottest guy I've ever friendzoned.
Listen I just pulled white girl hair out of my underwear. This has got to stop. I was wearing pants all night.
Then his buddy called and said "my car broke down, I need a ride. If I'm not home by midnight they'll extend my house arrest." And I knew it was time to leave.
The poop emoji wasn't even in my recents. Does that mean I'm growing up?
Did I tell you that I told him I deleted his dick pics and he almost started crying?
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
Id like to submit an apology whenever you feel like talking.
Its not gonna be for awhile Im not a very forgiving person especially since you TOTALED MY FUCKING CAR.
Can we climb Your roof?
No bitch its 2am go home.
Randomize
