if you come down to my room ill tell you a secret
I love black thongs
Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
You then began crawling around in the grass with a magnifying class saying you were searching for the magic school bus.
yes, we have a friends with benefits thing. i found out he had never 69'd, done anal or had a threesome. i told him i was going to rock his world.
and what did he say?
there were no words. he looked like a kid on christmas morning.
I couldn't function. I was to the point where I was using a bottle cap as a monocle.
I just looked at the guy in the car next to me and he was wearing a divers mask. We just nodded cause we both understood.
look at his last status update. 3:41 a.m. "i love u and miss u already egg burrito. happy trails friend." OF COURSE HE SMOKES POT.
The drag queen we did coke with is going to be on Ru Paul's drag race. I feel so proud.
Don't ever feel guilty about what you put in your mouth best advice my gma ever gave me lmao
Why would I take you home? That would eliminate the chances of you making bad decisions I could ridicule you about later.
lost her for two hours. she was banging a russian guy in her car in the parking lot. he told her she was majestic.
He lit my hand on fire and bought me chicken nuggets. I'm in love.
Get ready for me I'm full of tequila and I want to be full of you next
Unless my dick prospects improve this year’s Halloween costume will include panties with “DTF” written on them and a push up bra
Randomize