You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
Found my sandals in your freezer this morning, THANKS
So I went outside my house this morning and basically my entire front lawn is covered in gummi bears... I think that involves you guys.
i feel like you're just hanging onto the edge of functioning wino.
I'm buying drugs in the library...And it's not even finals time. What has my life become?
Do you remember Kelly my alter personality? She talked like a man and would sing amazing grace?
My living room is scattered with glow sticks wrappers, sparklers, face paint & beer cans?
It's not as cool looking when the drugs wear off, is it?
You know it's been a while when you're having to resort to positive conditioning to get women
But I swear to god if I'm awkwardly there while you try to have sex with someone again I'm getting high with your dad
Nothing says love like couples STD testing
Nothing says breakup like the results
I am disappointed by everyone's lack of ability to dance on a stripper pole:(
And I'm stuck at home while my dad's in vegas hanging out with Zach gali... Zach... That guy from the hangover
good news: smoking weed at school again, quality of life has improved drastically
He just didn't want his drunk dick pulled out of his windbreaker at the family party
So I heard her yell at him and I went downstairs to find he had lit up each one of my smokes and taken just one drag off each and had em lined up on the table. She says he "experiments" when on Ambien.
Randomize
