I just found 'pokemon orgy' in my search history
I hate myself for knowing the words to party in the USA.
I'm starting to think The only feelings I have anymore are drunk and hung over
you can't hurt those
Calling yourself a modern day Geisha doesn't justify being a whore.
you also choked him out with your legs on the kitchen floor..
you know it's gonna be a good 4/20 when you start saving up for it in january.
I'm surprised I haven't crapped out a leprechaun, I'm so hungover
I'm calling it the Friendlationship with Benefits Zone.
We pretended the crowd cheering the Thunder's win was cheering for us while we had sex on the couch.
When you and Blake get an apartment I want you to buy this Costco couch I'm currently passing out on.
Did I send you a drunk selfie with a pine tree last night?
a victory without nudity is not really a victory
I dont need your sympathy!!!! Just a fifth of vodka and gummy bears...lots and lots of gummy bears to take my agression out on.
She and I had some intense sexual tension earlier when she dumped a package of apple straws all over my body.
I am the image of restraint, it's why im just hungover and not in the hospital
Randomize
