first missing my period. then crying at the clinic... but why?
we had sex 3 months ago. you missed your period 2 weeks ago. but nice try.
Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
In a meeting with the accounting department. This shit is even more boring in real life and there isn't a professor to wake me up.
she was carrying the quesadilla around the bar like a security blanket
As soon as he told me I had a 'pretty laugh' I knew I'd be putting out more than I had originally planned.
The strip club called, they have your shoe.
This is going to be BYOBM Vegas trip: Bring Your Own Bail Money.
Currently bleeding through my leggings. Not good. Not good at all.
Hospital.
I am invincible.
Dude she only counts as your gf if you're home. We both signed the fair game contract when we became roommate. So are you really going to be mad or come eat a waffle with us?
Most of the bar is playing trivia I'm playing destroy a relationship in twenty questions
Her boobs take up a lot of room so God had to skimp on the brains
I went to her house she had a kid pool in her living room watching the vacation channel drinking rum out of the bottle saying" life is what you make it. Mines a vacation!!!"
6 more days and it'll be a year since i slept with him and never went home
I'm smoking and watching the Muppets Treasure Island. Where are you?
Something about that statement reminds me just how much of a role model you are, sis.
Are you really trying to argue your case that you seduced my cat?
Randomize
