Is it weird if i grunt like Tim Taylor when im having sex AND grilling steaks??
can someone explain to me why i woke up under a twister sheet
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
I dont care about anyone or anything else I just want to make love to you on my air mattress
They turned the water off again. Brushed my teeth with whats left from those pitchers of mojitos. So hung over i dont even care.
Let me start this apology by saying you were the finest piece of ass I ever had.
You can identity the picture as me the mistress his wife and him. It's that kinda awkard.
The car just stinks of weed and we are all sitting here trying to hide it from my mom by rolling down the windows, like it's not coming off my sisters boyfriend
Is she still in your room?
Not for long. My plan is to smoke her out like a small woodland creature.
I'm on my way back with the wine... And a puppy. It was free.
He whispered "Are you feeling it now Mr. Krabs?" when he was inside me. That is NOT my fetish.
after what u told me last night I think we're past the wtf zone and at this point u should just join me in wondering if my barista lover is a gay porn star
Your first mistake was thinking that you could get through the day without drinking a single bottle of alcohol. Your second mistake was wearing shark boxers.
Some nights you do cocaine till 5:00 in the morning, and the next night you teach yourself how to crochet. It’s called balance.
I just volunteered myself to get tazed this should get interesting
Randomize
