We were both sleeping and she woke up and just puked i feel so bad for everyone around us
Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
I just want to make him a cookie cake that says "you have no chance with me."
stuffed animals make me feel really maternal.
When you want to head down the cleveland on Sunday?
What time do the bars open? I dont want to remember how bad theyre gonna lose
I can't right now...you know Sunday night is whn I get drunk and do laundry.
Your dad needs a mid life crisis affair thing, I could totally be that girl.
He made me cum 4 times, we high fived afterwards and then I proceeded to tell him about this guy I'm dating whilst I made him a bacon sandwich. I think we've finally mastered being friends with benefits.
And if I don't get arrested for drinking and canoeing over the next 3 days, this hurricane will not have turned out anywhere near as well as I planned
Look. I've got things to do today.. Will you hurry up and come over so I can give you some head and get my day started already
Outside
Well I just put wine in my tea
my cockatiel has aquired a taste for beer. I should not be allowed to own exotic pets.
Just checking to make sure you weren't kidnapped, pregnant or watching Fox News.
... why is there baby oil , black socks and frozen hot dogs in the sink this morning ?
I like the new guy, he keeps beer in the fridge.
Randomize
