I just saw a hot homeless man
i realized my work ethic and productivity really improves if i masturbate on my lunch break.
he just told me about his fetish for rubbing grape jelly on his penis.
Dude, Her having kids just means she puts out.
she was pretty much dry humping my leg when her boyfriend walked in. he says "you should probably leave." all i could come up with was "YEAH, I KNOW!"
i love how he claims to not know english but when i ask him to come over and fuck me he's all of a sudden fluent
he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
Just asked my dog if he was proud of me for making it home. That drunk.
Then he said something about how from that angle I looked just like his mom.
She was puking in a plastic bag while cleaning where she puked on the floor. She knows how to multitask.
We used the solo cup bag for her hair tie. Desperate times call for desperate measures.
I'm pretty sure the guy in front of me at Walmart doesn't have good plans. It's one am he is buying a flash light and black bandanna
Can't trust a bar that doesn't have fireball
SCUSE ME I KNOW YOU DIDNT DO THAT MUCH COKE IN 10 MINUTES
THIS FUCKNUGGET
DOES HE EVEN REALIZE HOW MANY INCREDIBLE INSULTS I'VE WASTED ON HIM
I'VE INSULTED THE EVERLOVING SHIT OUT OF HIM AND HE CAN'T EVEN APPRECIATE IT
THE HO
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