Topless wife handwashing shirt. Tonight marriage is good.
soo apparently i was out of money so i stayed in the bathroom for an hour-ish passing out paper towels for money..needless to say i got kicked out
her facebook's as public as her vagina
The Rock is playing the tooth fairy. I can't believe I used to smell what that man was cooking
vegan vag taste different. and not a good different
He scored a 8.5/10 on that girls powerpoint. Of course I slept with him
We didn't have beer, so we played mini-beer pong with shots and frozen peas.
Btw. Made out with a random kid at a frat. It's all good though. He invited us to his frat party tomorrow so yay! For having plans!
you can officially check off peeing off the 5th floor while shouting "I want to break the guinness world record for longest piss stream" off your college to do list.
When did it become appropriate to call your mother the morning after? While still naked in bed? WHEN?!
ecstacy + fleshlight = not all that upset about being newly single anymore
That would be an interesting position... Not entirely certain how that'd work!
Gravity is no match for my libido
He's in the same dorm as me. We are sharing a laundry room, gym, and cafeteria. I'VE ALREADY COMMITTED DORMCEST AND MOVE-IN DAY ISN'T UNTILL NEXT WEEK!!!!
Last thing I remember is whiskey shots. My roommate tells me we were there 15min before I decided to run home naked. And we live across from a police station.
He called me Kitten either just because or he figured out my old s&m life. Either way huge turn on.
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