i wonder what megan fox's vagina feels like.
Heaven soaked bacon.
well, atleast the road to alcoholism is fun.
i knew it was time to break up with him once he pulled out the Halo foreplay costumes
If the first sentence isn't something about weed or the nature of choclate I'm skipping class.
and i had to drink on "never have i ever unsuccessfully tried to seduce a virgin ginger"
It's horrible of you to say your above all this when the bar uses your drunk picture to scare people.
Did I at antime last saturday slip away and sign up for a prayer circle?
worst part about day drinking... waking up to george lopez
Taking back a box of condoms is possibly the most depressing thing i've ever done
There's a very real possibility that I'll wake up in your uncle's driveway.
Tell me again why I left before the topless cake fight
My house smells like bleach. Also, I do not feel bad about all the stuff I stole from the hospital while I was there.
There is not enough whiskey in the world to get me through what happened on Pretty Little Liars tonight.
First world problems.
still drunk.please come get me.he kicked me out because i couldn't stop laughing about passing out in the middle of taking his virginity.
So apparently I fell asleep sitting on the toilet last night while my drunk girlfriend sang to me.
Randomize
