fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
i can't wait to kiss dudes with my vampire teeth in.
Even though he is humpbacked he is really good in bed.
I just saw her shopping list. The only things on it are blackberries, hot fudge and condoms. I almost don't wanna know. Almost.
Leaving your birthday party to engage in a threesome IS allowed. I checked the rule book.
Awkwardly walking by your fuck buddy and waving a casual hi in his direction like nothing has happened is probably the best thing in my life
Circle jerk is a real thing. It looks like five innocent virgins in a closet at my brother's bar mitzvah. Yeah, I walked in on that.
I need a priest, doctor, and therapist after this weekend.
You came walking in the backyard at 10am, in cowboy boots, a new shirt, and had no money,....we lost you for 15 hours....i think you just need a camera crew, or an assistant. IMPRESSED!
I ate icecream cake off your tits for my birthday, if that's not love I don't know what is.
Someone should make a valentines day card that says "I like the way you continuously consume thc with no concept of a limit other than drug supply" Because I'd send that to you.
He has no idea he's waking up in slut palace tomorrow morning
Did you take the full box of samoas or do I not remember getting baked and eating half a box by myself?
Just rode a bull topless for a free bar tap for a month
Come as you are, bitch. Glitter and vodka provided.
so we’ve decided to fuck for our own health
Randomize
