2 nights ago she wants to see other people, tonight she wants to have a threesome. The GOOD kind of threesome. So... win?
I was so high last night that i'm 89% sure my roommates set up an obstacle course for me and timed it. Not positive.. I think one of the challenges was pairing shoes
It's been over a month and I still can't find the bra I wore out on new years eve.
well she hit her head and had a concussion. i had to make out with her to keep her awake.
i think he was starting go for a boob grab when we both realized the middle of a public tennis court wasn't the place
I just found pizaa roll in my hair. Already been to class today
I think the multiple Sunday morning sirens outside my window are a plot by the cops to get back at me for the shit we pulled last night. Or I should move to a better area.
I think we should go through the tsa checkpoint with raging hardons when we go through LAX. I think we should pass out some viagra to everyone
I FINALLY HAVE A REASON TO DYE MY PUBES BLUE!!!
He was so drunk and proud of his 6-month-gym-results he actually made me touch his whole naked body.
I am eating a king sized snickers in the strip club. Good morning.
I'm really going to need you to stop yelling Campari.
i have too much dick at my disposal? i should make them fight. best dick pic gets laid
He's making me do the dishes for the next month and half because I shit in the bath tub...
Left him blackout in the cab, gave 20$ to the cabbie and said drive until the meter said he wasn't getting a tip.
Bangkok has him now.
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