It's an Italian thing I guess, grew up on that shit.
I'm Irish, we don't eat cow guts unless they're blended into a fine whiskey
I can't believe I'm wasting this thong on a guy in a sweater vest.
Dude, I had to masturbate just to stay warm. Please pay the gas bill?
Has now officially visited every ER in this city in one semester.
Shotgunned a beer while taking a bath.
some asshole was waslkibg around with ab electric razor and shaving parts of peoples heads.
her mom went out of her way to book us a room with separate beds... her level of gay denial is in beast mode
Made out with a chick in front of a girl I'm banging and successfully reDENNISed her within 9 hours
So, just saw a lady hysterically sobbing in a Walmart at 3 AM. Someone's not having a happy mother's day.
My dream date: Hotdogs/nachos from the bar & tequila. Is that too much to ask?
I should probably stop recommending my dentist to the different guys I'm seeing. That could be awkward in the future.
It's going to be like a slumber party but with ketamine
Nothing much. Just taking shots of tequila before I go get a bikkini wax. You?
just saw a girl run into an automatic sliding door, back up and try again
I always want to see you. Honestly my only hesitation is that my ass is still kind of sore from Sunday 🥺
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