i think the cat found all the blow we lost...
Just beat my spinning in office chair record. Almost puked. Totally worth it.
on the brightside, the semester can only get better from getting a dui at 8 am on the first day.
your optimism is becoming unhealthy
Goats are brash and offensive and cocky animals
Are you high and at a petting zoo again?
For u too. Could be years before u have a finger in ur ass
I really think that guy just walks around with tennis balls in his pocket. No dick is that big
Your boobs are like a big quesadilla marker
If you're wondering why you have playpen balls it's because we stopped at chuckie cheese on the way home.
I'm pretty sure I just need an IV drip of Plan B at this point...
its not like i called off work either time for the purpose of tripping, it was more like well, i have nothing to do now today, there is acid and im only human.. but twice
I'm playing drinking games with a boy who looks like Liam Hemsworth. I think I'm fine.
Hey Cat, it's Michael. You made out with me for a hot dog last night and I feel super used.
Why is it that the asexual in our group is the one that gets laid the most often??
Anytime he goes down on me i automatically think of you cheering me on. Your a good friend.
He just kept repeating "It was like meep meep meep on my balls."
Randomize