Haven't eaten in 11 hrs. I am gonna have so much material to talk about with anorexic girls now
Seriously, I'm delusional. Idk how these models even walk on the runway
I am not hooking up with him just to see what his penis looks like.
Actions speak louder than words. Her actions scream crazy.
She made me go with her to get a pregnancy test since she's missed a few birth control pills. She made me park in the "expectant mothers" spot at CVS and preceded to ask if it would be in the pest control section.
i have received so many congratulations texts this morning. sleeping with him really was a good decision.
ive got a scarf tied around my face holding bags of hashbrowns to it, im too boss to care
That final makes me want to drink myself into the fetal position
Can we just smoke a few bowls and eat grilled cheese while drunk in our hotdog suits at 9am ?
If you are breathing, I want you at your house. No non-breathing-related excuses.
Also CANADIAN LIPS TASTE OF MAPLE SYRUP AND APOLOGIES. SORRY.
I have to go buy generic plan b after work. I don't even leave for the new semester for another 11 days. I think I just leveled up in sluttiness
"Don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor..." he chanted helplessly
Currently tripping balls and watching Pink Floyd the wall and I'm crying during it. If this isn't a self realization then I don't know what to tell you.
Burnt food and a broken vibrator. Disappointment after disappointment. Is April a man?
i feel like every weekend turns into a giant blur of i dont want to know...
Randomize
