she looked like the before picture.
Some dude at the gas station right now is buying a 30 rack of beast and a can of cat food. Happy Thanksgiving.
Sooo sorry about that. And crying. And comparing my life to a duck
counting down the days left of school on my birth control packet.
She asked me why I was wearing a Batman Suit. Have I ever needed a reason to wear a Batman Suit?
By the way, i got bored and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
sleazy september. first one with mono loses.
He whinnies like a horse when he's cumming. I wish I would have known this before we got into a relationship.
I was an emotional waste case that night. She made me stroke her ponytail.
I blacked out after you got about 8 goldfish out of the tank and put them in your pockets. We're not allowed back. It was a sucky Walmart anyway...
Ten minute nap on a staircase honey badger don't care
I love you. Mom got to wasted at the wedding that she threw up on my shirt.
I feel like I should throw some tampons around my workspace so everyone will know what's really going on
MORE IMPORTANTLY I THINK I JUST WATCHED SOMEONE GET SO LONELY AS TO TURN BISEXUAL??
What's your opinion on eating ass? Just looking for a yes or no
My boss's toddler just went through my bag and found your vibrator...you owe me a drink.
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