But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
bar tonight had a doorbell to get in and last night i saw my neighbors fuck on the balcony, she wore a nurse outfit. Missouri isn't so bad...
so just incase you wake up on the couch wondering how you got there--you came home at 7am, put ice in a cup--then you proceeded to put the cup in the microwave and melt it because you "wanted water". you then, fell down the stairs while saying "you don't know me" then crawled to the couch.
he then started listing things that have been up his butt, never drinking in boys town again
Kinda felt bad though cuz she whimpered and shuttered a lot, i felt like i was kicking a puppy, only the puppy liked it and came a bunch
I'm using my ex boyfriends dog to find a guy at the park I could see fuck buddy potential in. I'm the queen of irony.
I swear if she asks me for a baby one more time I'm gonna sleep with one of her friends
He's living a porn movie. He's slept with a waitress at her work for lunch, a bar tender at the bar that night, and the cleaning lady the next morning.
Basically I will actually need a reindeer pulled sleigh to make it to all the penises in one night.
Is the Glover Park Chipotle past the strip club?
Why is that your only point of reference?
Just answer the question
Nothing like a dick pic from your fave ex to make you audibly exhale sadly.
Let’s try it, I’ve never had a bad time with sex, tacos and beer.
Ccatlin cimbing thru th sunroof plz come
i realized my signature handshake has now become a hookup. i love what college has done to me.
I’m turning 34 on Friday and I feel like the only thing I’ve accomplished in life so far is getting into pissing matches with clients
Randomize