Fuck the gym. I just shaved m'cooch and my pants now fit looser.... Dont judge me.
I never thought I would get head to the lion king soundtrack
Things we need. Powerade. Water in fridge. Mixers for vodka. And reality checks.
I'm trying on my bridesmaid dress so that I can determine what will need to be done to achieve getting fucked while wearing it.
woke up outside on the porch naked surrounded by beer cans with a towl around my neck. i must be in heaven cause i've never seen this place before.
Also I spent like 2 hours on the hubble/nasa website sunday night looking at pictures of outer space and cried my face off at how beautiful and complex it is. What's wrong with me?!
You told her to step on the scale because you had whiskey goggles, and scales don't lie.
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
Yeah. Got a major ego boost when she said she felt like she had just fucked King Arthur. Buying some donuts later to celebrate with, wanna join?
i feel like when you brought up the possibility of you getting pregnant the sexting is over
Just bought a gingerbread house kit and pregnancy tests. Happy holidays.
Well, I'm most mad that he lied to you (about being married)...but the CAT THING IS A CLOSE SECOND
I just met him at a place called the meat farm, Jesus be a shield.
I just remembered I casually gave you a tour of the house after we boned...lol
If you can wrestle my underwear off of me, you can top. It'll be like using an amulet in Legends of the Hidden Temple. Instead of not getting captured, you don't get fucked in the ass.
Randomize
