my room smells like sperm. sweet.
It smells like Drakkar Noir and desperation out here.
That's why you should quit smoking.
I wish life was like the Sims. Right when you're pregnant the music would play and I would just know instead of agonizing for the next two weeks.
I got a chicken sandwich and a frosty out of her. Better then having sex
chatroulette drinking game turned into a foursome.
I feel like I'm sitting in a sleigh of puddy. It's not a bathtub though because you need a sleigh to go down a mountain.
I can't wait for the day Google doesn't remind me that I got arrested for having 3 shots called 'frog cum' lined up in front of me.
please tell me we weren't that bad as freshmen
i can't, we're worse now
We just took back to back grav bong hits and are playing battleship. She guessed Z - 12 so weve switched board games.
I came in and I guess my parents didn't hear me. My dad just said "Don't be lazy, RIDE IT." to my mom. Never coming home again.
you never know what sharing a kayak could lead to
It's true
I'm going to start charging you rent if you keep leaving your random conquests on my living room couch the morning after
Fair warning: I will be throwing corn dogs at you every time I see you this week.
Why do I have this feeling like this is heading in a slightly threesome-y direction
I should probably add her on Facebook for as much as I cheat off her in Physics, huh?
Randomize
