What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
Just saw a midget shotgun a coors light
they just came back. i guess "were gonna go get dinner" means "were gonna fuck for 5 minutes at the little league field"
so i just calculated it and i would need to score 150% on this final to pass
Just made hot dog dorito pasta. It happened.
You rolled out of the car, got on all fours and puked then just nonchalantly stood up and waved goodbye and thanks for the ride.
Doing lines and watching a show on hot dogs around the world ... Why do I do this to myself
She just started grabbing all the hospital's rubber gloves and face masks and shoving them in her purse, saying, "My tax money paid for these!"
Last time I get high to write a paper the night before it's due. "Tiny Wings and sexuality" is not an acceptable topic to for a paper. Class in 30 minutes. I'm fucked...
I smell like icyhot and vodka... Heres to my pulled tendon.
It was everywhere. My dick was a sprinkler of lost future children.
I want to get "Patrick Kane" wasted tonight
I am one hundred percent down for that
I just feel like if we dated, he'd just be crying the entire relationship
Can't we just go back to fucking and having your boyfriend think you're completely straight?
Is it weird that I'm smoking a cig on my back patio in a sports bra and underwear?
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