that drag queen yelled at him and touched me to make him jealous and said things like this is what a real man feels like. it was a thrill.
Thong +tight pants =hungry butt. Not a good look on big women! Walmart sucks.
The best revenge is premature balding
Most guys don't get turned on by "skinny, gangly legged girl with glasses laying in bed touching herself." You better start working on your diction if you're gonna keep up the sexting.
I'm graduating. Then you'll never see me again.
We better fuck soon then
How does "I'm not drinking tonight" turn into body shots?
I feel like if you're funneling natty lights on a Wednesday at 2:30pm at the apartment complex pool during finals week, you probably don't have your priorities straight.
Andy was trying to screw his door shut from the inside so no one could get in.
Thursday could be nutella day. You could make me a nutella sandwich and then fuck me senseless
I can always pull a half day at work too. My boss makes exceptions for drug use. Lol. I fucking love my job.
Today is a shit your pants at work kinda day
I just ordered cookies for delivery. My life is falling apart.
Our sub is singing "i believe i can fly" after yelling at the class this whole time and this is really hella weird
Dude she literally licked him. He was covered in cheese and in her high state what else was she gonna do?
so he found out i have him as "average size" in my phone. fair to say we arnt going to be dating anymore
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