I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
I'd steal beers with my tail. If I were a monkey.
24 hours later and my vagina is still tingling. That good.
I need to sleep with 3 more guys by midnight to meet my 2010 resolution..
Remind me again why a vodka watermelon can't be a thanksgiving dish
I just yelled at a bunch of girl scouts for yelling "cookies" to loudly. That hungover
My head is pounding and I need an ice pack for my vag. Successful friendsgiving!
not a day goes by that I don't wish you were here or I there. Today it was because I had the desire to get high and go look at the jellyfish at the aquarium and you're the perfect buddy for that.
Dude I just came exactly at the crescendo of the Catalina wine mixer duet from step brothers.. Advance to next level.
I think the exact words were 'I'd lett him to the weirdest shit to me'
I just bought a bong from a hot dog stand.
what do we think the timeline is for when your liver will begin to revolt against your drinking habits?
Oh no. Did we do a blood oath again?!
That was fun and all, but let's never have sex on a ladder ever again.
I just snorted sandwich everywhere.
I hope it smells nice :)
IT DOESN'T BECAUSE I HAVE MEAT COMING OUT OF MY NOSE, DAMNIT.
Randomize
