Soo i just shotgunned a water balloon...
Fuck him tonight for the both of us. We're still tag-teaming in spirit.
The question of "Will I eat a piece of curried chicken off the floor?" has been answered tonight.
I still don't know why you took that job... it sounds miserable
not having any beer money sounds even more miserable
im still going. this is my new reality. also. dont take glowsticks in the bath. they explode. actually. do. it. its beautiful.
i dont think thats healthy man...
I just stood next to my childhood self. Fuck, I'm really stoned...
Recycling my beer bottles from breakfast counts for earth day, right?
That would make regret #10
He was more like the original regret
As the bouncer was escorting you out, you yelled "keep your filthy dick beaters off me!"
I was super naked---except I kept my shoes on, because I'm a lady, and I was bent over a bar.
Today is a shit your pants at work kinda day
I'm torn between regretting everything and regretting nothing.
I may forget my underwear, but you can count on me for drugs and plan b
I am witnessing a blind guy whip ass at beer pong
He ate me out while I was wearing a canada goose parka and a dress hand crafted by a seamstress from yellowknife. I came while watching the northern lights. Most arctic orgasm ever.
Randomize
