Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
Come to wood. Julia is putting pants on. We must stop her.
Annihilated within 20 minutes of arriving on Saturday, proceeded to hook up with him half a dozen times/almost have sex in the shed. Later on I text his boyfriend letting him know he's okay and that he's asleep next to me. If I could parlay this skill into a vital component of national security I'd be the Jack Bauer of homewrecking. Diner later?
can we get nightvision for the apartment?
It was just a reflex. BOOM I kicked her in the face
In your defense, I really thought capturing that alligator would have been a lot more awesome and a lot less tragic.
RIP Mr Bojangles.
His response today determines what state my vagina will be in this weekend.
Yeah. Just jump him. Naked. Claim his dick for yourself.
Feel better punkin. Your balls will be gently resting on my forehead in no time
Hey, you can't rush the perfect creeper shot. I need buffer time to hone my skills.
I have nothing to say other than the obvious 'we probably shouldn't have done that' and the less obvious 'i think you bruised my labia major' ...?
He was Jesus for Halloween and I definitely got on my knees and gave him praise.
His Australian accent during sex made me think I was in an Outback Steakhouse commercial
Haha idk you were stealing pizza dough at dominos
You don't make any sense
TEQUILA
Randomize