I'm at the bar and I just saw some unnecessary and accidental cooter...sometimes I think girls need a license to go out pantyless in public.
someone shit in a solo cup and left it at the base of the stairs. fuck orlando dude.
Ive either hit rock bottom or become my own hero.
I love how all these freshman girls think that they can wear what they wore last summer... freshman 15 at its skankiest
I'm not being over dramatic, but I think my heart is going to stop beating.
Her face is stuck to the frozen jager bottle. I think shes ok with it
He wanted to take a picture with our pizza to show his mom that I was pretty but more importantly that he practices in "sober" activities
Apparently he proposed after he saw me chug vodka out of a traffic cone.
You want a summary? Scottish women that start drinking at 7 am. Cherries soaked in moonshine. Japanese beer. Old men smoking stuff that I'm pretty sure is illegal here and in Japan. One is doing a karaoke striptease. There's your summary.
I feel like there should be a database and you screen your boyfriend's scrotum and all the fucked up shit they've done goes on file.
It's gotten so bad I typed my will out on my phone in case it's over.
You are free to stop by. I promise to keep my penis in my leather pants
But truly, sorry about your empty vagina
Thanks boo.
Wanna see if we can get cut off at bdubs again? The same hipster manager that is younger than us is working again
I'm not having sex with him if he doesn't believe in gay marriage and abortions.
Randomize
