Why are there so many empty soda cans in my room?
You put them in a circle around your bed and said it was the best way to ward of the witches from hocus pocus....then you remembered you needed salt too. I'm assuming you havent gone to the bathroom yet.
third eye blind makes so much more sense now that i have a drug problem
found glitter on my cock. thank you for bringing me to that dance recital.
Did they have a limo or was i just stoned?
So then I proceeded to the kitchen to make my "specialty," which consisted of a frozen veggie burger topped with peanut butter. I guess he ate it too.
there is nothing more depressing than your birth control alarm going off while you're masturbating, and realizing you've been taking pointless precautions for over a month now.
Just picked up an ounce of keif and if it goes to waste before the world ends I'm gonna haunt the shit out of somebody when we all die.
possibly one of my favorite moments was wiping it off your nose after you high fived a bouncer
90 seconds of pumping and 2 months of bragging all summer. So much for my reputation here.
we got kicked out of the bar last night for sneaking into the back kitchen and eating handfulls of cheese in the walk in fridge
In other news, Justin Bieber has a big dick and that makes me uncomfortable.
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
I'm trying to drink up the confidence to run in public.
How does the curb feel today?
It's stronger than my elbow. But I found my lighter while I was down there.
We are so disgustingly codependent and I wouldn't have it any other way
Randomize