I really like you and I'm tired of just hooking up. I want you be my boyfriend.
Uhh, I'm not breaking up with my girlfriend to be with you.
he then started listing things that have been up his butt, never drinking in boys town again
just threw up in the bus full of other international students just outside of boulder, just keeping the aussie reputation alive
Isiahs hammered. And just came in to get his skateboard and said he has to prove something. This can't end well
Of course, you get to fuck all night while I'm stuck in the girls bathroom sucking a limp dick for coke
If you're still on campus there's a jack and coke in the bathroom of fondren science Bldg. Too strong to bring to class.
Day drunk and a can of soup and wine straight from the bottle and alone and on my kitchen floor.
What can I say? When alcohol is my motivation, I can move mountains.
I knew it was a good Wednesday night when I woke up tucked in to NOT my own bed with my beer helmet, an empty bottle of Jose, and a trash can placed in front of my face.. Happy 20th!
This is gonna be a long day for my vagina and I
that's what I'm here for. I'm literally just bad advice mixed with motivational sentences.
He was simultaneously rubbing my shoulders and fucking me. I'm keeping him.
I've run into almost every guy I've ever slept with today. It's like they know just how horny I am.
No. I don't like you. I like your penis. Chin up. At least I like part of you.
she is currently in the shower drinking a beer and dancing to a song called "the penis song" my roommate is cooler than yours
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