she gave me a schnouzer then wanted to kiss while we were having sex...i had to puppy slap her nose. pick me up out front.
Just paid for that girls abortion on my dad's black card. I feel like P-Diddy.
just found deep spiritual meaning in spongebob.... that high.
Nobody is wearing shirts anymore. What is happening.
Checked out the free sonogram van on campus and got a free DVD of my sweet food baby.
she screamed"i told you already! counter clockwise spiral and the clockwise spiral!!" right in the middle of sex
wow, i never thought dating a choreographer would be so harsh
WHAT DID YOU SAW VERBATIM. VERBATIM IS SOBER FOR WORD FOR WORD
I'm driving while wearing hulk hands
U thinks that's bad? He told me that he had to envision high school wrestling in order to bust a nut with some girl
Btw, you're my emergency contact at Planned Parenthood
Uh oh we had sex and I don't think I like him anymore help
Now we just need to figure out why your underwear was in your bra
I would fuck him just for his dog
You weren't stupid you just made an ass of yourself. It's called a birthday party. That's code for night of regrets.
How do I tell my boss I have slutty fantasies about him, me and his conference room table?
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