Why didn't you tell me that Dad was a registered sex offender?
We were going to tell you eventually, how'd you find out?
Our school resource officer showed us how to use Family Watchdog and pulled up his picture.
I just had a dream where Bob Saget recognized me from when I hung out with him in a dream I had months ago.
they started a semi-successful rumor that toby keith died. who says fraternities don't have goals
Note to self. Champagne flavored lube is neither as tasty nor as classy as one might think.
I pretty much just threw a bunch of clothes and my vodka in a bag..idk where I'm gonna end up tonight but I'm prepared.
Seriously what kind of college town is this? Nobody parties during the week or abuses perscription drugs
I'm sorry I peed on your everything.
A sexy devil squat down and peed in front of Tom Hanks from Castaway.
You called me your momma bear, and then demanded more vodka
No, dude...I agree it's great in theory but I promise you that 80 drunk 21 year old sorority girls together in one room for formal is one of the worst drama filled ideas ever. Ever.
The three of us were sitting silently in my dining room at 4:30 am, half drunk, eating cold spaghetti and listining to death metal. I need a fucking cigarette.
Something tells me tonight will end with me wearing my pants on my head again.
Is it just me or is it like a girl gets married and all of a sudden she’s a “blogger”?
Drunk. Send nudes. Just curious.
My law teacher drew an elephant on the board in class. I was so high that I laughed for 5 minutes straight. Nobody else laughed and everyone stared. 130 people knew I was high.
Randomize
