I'm eating oreos and watching porn. This is your fault.
idk if ive ever seen a picture of him on facebook with his pants on
literally. a puddle of blood. on the floor. still searching for the source
Why the hell did you invite him? He's gonna bring two more inches of dick and zero fun.
You know I found it really difficult to find a full lenght picture for the egg donor site where I wasn't holding any alcohol...
That BJ in the bathroom was definitely worth the $20 cover.
A man just squeezed past me in a tight space and said, "Excuse us."
I need to go back to work. I've had so much sex since the shutdown started. last night we tried and a little flag came out saying "nothing is left in here try a week later"
Definitely had a dick in my ass while watching the Seahawks win. Best NFC Championship game ever.
I'm good. We walked you back to my apartment and you demanded to eat the sandwich I made for him
Hahaha she was way into you and you kept arguing about burritos. It was amazing.
I just did shots of fireball with my dad in a car wash. How's your pregaming going?
well I got an eye infection from a stripper motorboating me but overall it was a great weekend
WHY HAVE SO MANY THING GONE IN MY BUTT ON THIS TRIP
the orange of my hangover Tang is hurting my eyes... my coworkers knew it was hangover Tang too.
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