Bonnaroo quote of the day: "why the fuck am i pregnant?!?!" - exclaimed loudly by random hippie.
Its a three day weekend with Valentines day thrown in... Im obligated to get drunk
i'm drinking with a bunch of phds, i feel very stupid but good about my drinking abilities
hey got me stoned for the first time when i was 14. there is no bond stronger
I just ate a whole pineapple for lunch. You should be begging to give me a bj tonight.
I looked up while we were having sex to see him covering my pillow pet's eyes with his free hand. I think I'm in love
I bought everclear. Bring your party pants and some addies
You're not gonna punch me in the face again are you?
Watching elf, eating a tub of ice cream, and coming to terms with the fact that I haven't had sex in 5 months. Happy fucking holidays.
Iron Man just asked me back to his place... Not sure I can handle this. Wish me luck.
He put his burrito in the bag with his dildo.
I'm not fucking any of these fools. But if they want to buy me Olive Garden, that's their business.
my boobs just made me lose a game of beer pong. the balls hit them, bounced off and into the cup. twice. ive never been so disappointed in them.
ps why does my dog smell like popcorn and a dryer sheet..?
i woke up to drewlling on a plate of eggrolls half naked halfway between my bed and the floor, and i have no idea where my pants went
I have mystery bruises on my right knee, right arm, under my chin, and on my forehead. What the fuck happened last night??
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