I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
I took an adderall but just ended up meticulously arranging my farmville for hours
im stripping for him via video chat, but the sound is turned off cause his students are taking a test
they told me her nickname is "wizard sleeve"
pick me up NOW
I asked him if his doormat had a name, then proceeded to sit on it for the next 30 minutes while signing that magic carpet ride song from aladdin.
i think the penis that was inside of me changed my life
Remember when we pinky swore we'd never feel hungover alone...
The two girls sitting next to me are asking siri "Like, uh, how do you know my name?". Do I fuck with them or fuck them?
Now I can't unsee my hot boss's under-boobs. Monday will be awkward.
Pics or STFU
She's passed out with a slice of pizza between her boobs should I just eat it and leave
I feel like I should be having more sex dreams of my boyfriend than his sister..
Knowing that porn stars want to fall in love is the weirdest thing I've found to be beautiful recently. I'm so lonely.
It's a Saturday night and I am in bed with two cats, a bottle of Riesling, and I'm masturbating to Iron Man. I'm great at being 21.
Like bruh, I’m a free range girlfriend
His bedroom is the preferred destination of MILFs, cougars, recent divorcees and sexually frustrated wives
His penis is my hero
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