wow, i just saw a girl period all over the floor. get my shoes
he called me "his little blueberry cunt muffin"...how would that make you feel?
the roller ball on my blackberry is the closest i've come to touching a clit in 2 years.
i was more sad about losing him as neighbor on fishville than as a boyfriend
You both must have been completely wasted because every once in a while we would hear you both stop and start singing to each other. At one point it was taylor swift.
He met a random girl on the bus home and decided to go to Spain with her. The blackout decisions are becoming internationally epic. He has work in the morning.
How is it possible that I am in a completely different city, and there are 2 dudes here that I've banged? How????
He only had napkins in the bathroom... no toilet paper. If I fuck him, am I settling?
The light burnt out and he thinks the power is out in the whole house. He is cooking a hog dog over two candles. I'm gonna see if he'll make me one
You came running into my room at 4 in the morning yelling "SANCTUARY!" and flung yourself into bed.
Hmmm, sounds like a Jaeger night then. Did I at least get to be the little spoon?
Besides the one of you shaking your cock for 10sec that was one of the best snapchat's ever haha
You just get me....like our souls are boning in the spirit world
He offered to take me to my appointment after breakfast then kind of just sat there and watched me get a papsmier. Most awkward first date ever.
doc says my ankle might be broken, they're going to do xrays. He asked me what happened and I told him if he could find out that would be great.
good morning. i just did a walk of shame in front of his grandmother.
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