now everythime i write "i'm" in my phone my tap9 spells out "i'm-never-drinking-again". It's trying to remind me
Just used the D.E.N.N.I.S system successfully.
.....then i was kicked out of my work christmas party......
We'll cross that bridge when we come to it... Or burn it. Either way we'll deal with it later
Somebody started a fire in the kitchen. I puked on it till it went out. The firemen high fived me.
You were rubbing your foot on one of your legs and kept saying, "My sock feels like a waterslide!"
Being a responsible DD does not include attempting to coordinate a 4 taxi caravan to bar #3
There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
I just puked my brains out on the side of the road (see picture) And I took a picture for our scrapbook! I am always thinking! =) tell me your proud?!
She kicked in my bedroom door in only high-heals with a bottle of wine, announcing it was "cock-o-clock"
Got a handy at the foam party. Took girl home. Banged her. Thanked her for foam handy. "what handy?"
I guess when I black out I feel that it's not inappropriate to grope my gf in front of her parents.... But hey at least I'm starting off 2013 single
I thought I could grab a hold of my stream of urine. So she left pretty soon after that.
whatever bro. i had ice cream and whiskey for breakfast and its noon. this is the second worst christmas ever.
You poured 151 in your eye, ran face first into a tree, fell down, then threw a lawn chair at the dog...all before passing out in the hallway and pissing yourself. There is no way to redeem yourself.
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