I want to make a zoo with you.
a kid in a transformers shirt tried to pick me up last night at work. he also rolled up on a bicycle, the kind with pedals. do i look that easy?
Now I'll never know if Megan finds a millionaire.
found: crazy homeless guy quoting Quagmire lines to every chick he sees. i think i win the scavenger hunt.
Hey, remember that girl at rocklobster you thought was hot but were to pussy to talk to? You were right, her boobs are fake and she gives the best head on the planet. Can you come pick me up?
You're dead to me.
I think the secretary can hear it when I fart in the bathroom, how do you think she feels about that?
Min and u sung xhionubjs. Cause that's what u kiij like a xhionunk
she asked how her costume looked and all i could say was bars are dark right?
Did you make me take pictures of your ass last night because you fucked on some wet paint or did i dream that?
My new dealer is 16. I have been getting high longer than he has been alive.
I don't see the problem
Honestly I will go to church for him, I will even try to quit smoking for him. But his dick is not worth losing alcohol. He sure as fuck isn't taking away our wine nights.
I want the address of the individual responsible for strawbeeritas. I want to send them gift basket.
Get your ass back to America. We've got a lot of drugs to do.
Where you at? Come home and endure this shit show called "The Second Presidential Debate".
He nicknamed his dick "the fountain of youth" I think it's time to move on...
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